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19 September 2014 @ 11:18 am
So it's been the summer for it-- two of my co-workers had their elderly cats die, and another friend posted on Facebook that his cat went this morning. Every one pulls a little bit at my heart because losing Eldest Son Cat is still so raw. I haven't cried this much in years.

Young Spotted Cat Grim is learning how to be #1 spotted cat. He hasn't mastered the cuddle or the upside-down-kitty, but he does come to snuggle in the bed and he talks to me a lot. The other day a co-worker was over and had his 5 year old daughter, and Grim just lit up and followed her around to be petted. That's what I love to see!

I've actually had a lot of fun this month-- we went to an event in Tulsa for Ingress, I did some sewing and some knitting and a lot of baking (and got pretty good at bread). We've had people over, and been all sociable. All of which is good for me.

But damn if I'm not still, in some corner of my heart, all busted-up broken about my boy. I mean, I knew life was going to be a continuing succession of loved ones dying, and I've been right so far, but I didn't expect it to hurt so much and for so long. It's still clean grief-- I mean, it's not festering, it's not awful. Just aching-sad. It's healing over slowly and from the inside out, like it should. But it still hurts, and I think it's going to be tender there for a long time, if not the rest of my life.

(When I am old and dying, I believe I want to thoroughly confuse my nurses and loved ones by demanding to be brought a spotted kitten, that I might snoogle it for the next generation. You know, as old men plant trees they'll never sit under...)

Posted to my DW at http://corrvin.dreamwidth.org/444204.html and you can comment there or here.
15 August 2014 @ 07:14 pm
End of life update for Eldest CatCollapse )

I've had a half-dozen likes since I posted that. I'm crying and covered in snot and my eyes are throbbing (I'm not a good cryer) but I really do feel loved. And like my friends are cheering us on, that we can make it this last little bit together.

And we will.

Edit: Saturday morning:
We did make it. He was so tired this morning that it broke my heart to pick him up. But he made it through with no pain and no fear.

Posted to my DW at http://corrvin.dreamwidth.org/444039.html and you can comment there or here.
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11 April 2014 @ 08:54 am
(Earlier this week, my partner Raven's dad passed away.)

Me: I'm going to the store, do you need anything?

Raven: I need... some sour cream. (very serious look) My dad passed away... and... I think... he would have wanted me to have it.

Me: How long are you going to ask for things that way?

Raven: About six months?

Me: Sounds fair.

Posted to my DW at http://corrvin.dreamwidth.org/443634.html and you can comment there or here.
Father out law passed today just before noon, peacefully. His son was there, and his sister (and brother-in-law) and daughter arrived just after.

I don't know what goes on in the last hours of someone's life-- I believe there is something that we do, some internal processing, some spiritual work maybe, that makes us ready for the end. Whether or not we're aware of who's with us at the end, surely they are aware of us, and it may be that something that the dying do is helpful to the rest of us as we go on.

I don't know, and hope not to find out for a few years yet.

Posted to my DW at http://corrvin.dreamwidth.org/443280.html and you can comment there or here.
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03 April 2014 @ 08:46 pm
Father-out-law still ill. But the hills are getting lower and lower, and pretty soon it's going to be time to get off the ride.

Things are under control. Mostly. For now. I think we'll run out of events before we run out of cope.

Posted to my DW at http://corrvin.dreamwidth.org/442956.html and you can comment there or here.
24 March 2014 @ 03:12 pm
Father-out-law (my partner's father) is very ill.

I... I think I have this under control. I think. We'll see how I feel at the end of this ride.

Posted to my DW at http://corrvin.dreamwidth.org/442752.html and you can comment there or here.
06 March 2014 @ 03:05 am
I got some good news at work, about a possible schedule change. It's not definite and I have to wait on approval, but this is something I've really wanted for a long time.

I should know within 3-4 weeks.

Posted to my DW at http://corrvin.dreamwidth.org/442118.html and you can comment there or here.
04 March 2014 @ 06:21 am
Had a pleasant conversation with my parents yesterday, in the car on the way home, because Raven drove me to and from work. Not much else happened; didn't return the books to the library, or indeed do anything other than go home, eat food, and go almost immediately to bed.

There is still lots of snow and ice on the roads, which means running today probably won't happen. Which is okay, still exhausted from the last two days. I'm starting to really miss when I can't run, and not just because my next goal is that "a month of rundays" achievement.

Started the 100 pushup challenge with a group of folks from the feminist board I read on Rav. Didn't think much of how it went yesterday (12 pushups, yay?) but today I am sore in the arms and chest, so I feel like I did something. Tomorrow, a couple more.

As a side note, updating this with a teeny Bluetooth keyboard on my phone screen is not so bad as anyone might think. It's actually pretty comfortable. (Glad I have that astonishingly good near focus that many myopics have.)

Posted to my DW at http://corrvin.dreamwidth.org/441809.html and you can comment there or here.
03 March 2014 @ 03:32 am
Someday I'll have a job that doesn't require me to come to work when the roads are completely terrible.

Today, unfortunately, is not that day. Our road conditions map is blue with ice and snow. I couldn't face de-icing my car again-- it was snowing when I came home this morning, so there's a thick layer of melted-snow ice on it. So I asked Raven to drive me to work, because his car lives in the garage.

If only I'd gotten a bit more sleep, I'd be entirely happy with this setup. For now. We'll see how I feel when I chip the car out in the morning to go to the library.

Posted to my DW at http://corrvin.dreamwidth.org/441376.html and you can comment there or here.
02 March 2014 @ 04:07 am
Hello again, internet. It's been a long, long time. This being the first bit of the month, let's see if I can post two or three times a week all month, hey? (I've learned that I do better one or two small steps at a time, instead of adding everything at once and then flailing under it.)

So, in the state of the Corry, we have: Read more...Collapse )

And it's nasty-awful outside, so wish me luck getting home from here.

Posted to my DW at http://corrvin.dreamwidth.org/441335.html and you can comment there or here.
Current Location: at the piranha store
24 May 2011 @ 07:01 pm
Cross-posting to LJ. LJ readers, I'm really on corrvin.dreamwidth.org now.

Huge storm hit OKC area. So far, two confirmed fatalities in El Reno (to the west of OKC). Our house totally missed it other than some teeny hail, pea-sized.

Very grateful. Trouble getting cats into safe places, working on that plan for next time.

Going back to bed.

Posted to my DW at http://corrvin.dreamwidth.org/425977.html and you can comment there or here.
29 December 2010 @ 02:48 am
Also, this will be my final crossposted entry. I won't be posting at LJ anymore, just here on DW. For those who only use LJ, you can go to corrvindw.livejournal.com and add that to your friends list; it pulls from my DW account when I post. For those already doing that AND reading my LJ, this is the last entry you'll see two of.

I won't be renewing my LJ paid account in February, so I have a month or so to save all my pictures elsewhere and move icons where I want them to go.

blathering and more listCollapse )
12 December 2010 @ 03:49 pm
I was having a perfectly nice time stargazing on the deck of the house I grew up in.

Then I woke up and I was 100 miles away, 20 years in the future, and it was daytime. I have brain whiplash.
01 December 2010 @ 10:08 am
Comments are screened!

I'm about to go out and buy holiday cards again this year.

If you want a card, post a comment with:
a) name(s) to whom I should address it
b) Address
c) If you need a non-religious card, or have any objections to rubber stamps, markers, or anything else I feel like tarting the cards up with before I send them.

Our address will be in the next post. :D
01 December 2010 @ 06:15 am
I'm at work, polishing off the last bit of Rocky Road ice cream that I brought earlier this week.

To be non-specific about work, all the absolutely vital things got done and progress was made on the not-so-vital things, and things that only I could do got done also.

Two days off sounds SO good. There might be some room-cleaning, too.
25 November 2010 @ 09:27 am
I'm thankful to live in a time and place that has clean water, warm houses, plenty to eat for humans and kitties alike; I'm thankful that we have comfortable clothes, and things to play with, and more electronics than any sane person can use at once. I'm thankful for modern medicine and over-the-counter remedies, too.

I'm thankful for living in a big city, in a place convenient to all the shopping I could ever want to do. I'm thankful to have the money to do that shopping, and a job that provides me with a steady income.

So I'm thankful even while I'm pissed that I have to go to work, in the freezing cold, on the holiday, with a sore throat, and then struggle home through the worst traffic of the year in the shopping district that surrounds my house.

To all the Americans on my f-list, have a good Thanksgiving! And to everyone else: so, how do you know when Christmas starts?
23 November 2010 @ 04:41 am

Spending the day taking Raven to buy a funeral suit for his grandfather's funeral Saturday. We could go Friday, but I'm not going to the maul on Black Friday.

Nothing else really fun planned. Sigh.
22 November 2010 @ 02:20 pm
It's 75 outside, which means it's 80+ and sweltering in my bedroom. At least the sun goes down by 6pm, and it starts to cool off, which means I can sleep then.

But right now I'm cranky, exhausted, and way too hot. I hate this weather. It makes me sleepless and miserable.

There's two kinds of chicken in the crockpot and bananas drying in the dehydrator, but I'm so hot I'm sick at my stomach, so that isn't even appeasing me.